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The memorial service is a gathering to grieve together. Family members should be allowed to start each conversation. Then friends can share memories. The deceased is attended by someone from time of death till the last moments of the graveside service. The body is prepared for burial by being washed. During this preparation it is mandated that the body always face upwards. Men are prepared for burial by men and women by other women. A simple white shroud is placed on the body. The men wear a prayer shawl with one tassel missing. All being interred in a simple shroud ensures the poor of receiving the same amount of dignity as the wealthy. A wooden coffin is used because a body is supposed to turn to dust eventually. Holes are drilled in the bottom of the casket for that reason. People show sorrow by tearing at their outer clothing. The decedent must be returned to the earth within 48 hours of passing away. According to Jewish custom, the casket is always closed. A rabbi prays in Hebrew. The family members may all contribute to delivering the eulogy. Everyone is expected to listen and show a reverent attitude during the ceremony. It is considered appropriate to wear conservative, dark colored clothing. Casual wear, including sandals, is not acceptable. The family members are the only ones who attend the graveside service. After that, the family sits shiva for the next week. Visitors come to offer their expressions of sympathy. It is customary to bring casseroles and other prepared meals. Kosher foods and other meals are all acceptable gifts. The family is supposed to be able to avoid cooking during the mourning period. Visitors share memories of the deceased in the form of anecdotes and stories. Jewish Funeral Etiquette encourages showing that the one who passed away will be missed and remembered. 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